10 Things You Should Never Say to An East Texan
Texans in general are a particular type of people. East Texans specifically have their own quirks and ways of life. I've recently become friends with people who are new to East Texas and I find myself in constant debate with them about how to say things and the way of life here. One thing I've had to do specifically is warn them about saying certain things. We here in East Texas are extremely proud and protective of our way of life. So, I've compiled a list of a few things that you should never say to an East Texan.
1. "It's So Hot!" (When the temperature is under 90 degrees)
No, this is not hot. This is NICE. Just wait until we hit 110 degree weather plus humidity, then you'll regret saying that 87 degrees in March was too hot.
2. "Sweet Tea is Gross"
Stop right there, do a U-Turn, and go back to where you came from. Sweet tea is our most precious passion here.
3. "In & Out Is Better Than Whataburger"
I'm sorry, what? There's a reason that a Whataburger is located every two blocks in Texas. BECAUSE IT'S THE BEST.
4. "Doesn't Everyone Ride Horses Into Town?"
No, the majority of us don't even own horses. Stop watching western films - thats not what Texas is like.
5. "Your Accent Is So Cute"
What accent? You're the one that talks funny.
6. "Ain't Isn't A Real Word"
Yes it is. We make up our own words here.
7. "Why Do You Have So Many Pairs of Boots?"
Why do you have so little pairs of boots? You're the odd ball here.
8. "Coke Tastes Better Than Dr. Pepper"
9. "I Don't Like Barbecue"
You are now officially not allowed back into the East Texas. That's what we live on here. If you want a veggie burger, go to California. This isn't the place for you.
10. "Isn't Two Stepping Basically Just Walking?"
No, Linda. Two stepping isn't walking. It's dancing. When you walk, do you do it to a rhythm, then spin your partner into a pretzel, dip her, then slide her on the dance floor between your legs, and start "walking" again without missing a beat? I didn't think so.